Wrote this some time earlier in office, so its a delayed post:
Feeling quite sleepy n bored in lab, so tot i might as well write somethingjuicy for my blog to keep myself awake. Not many pple might have knownthis stuff. Perhaps only with the exception of lishan. Well, dun tink it will hurt to share. Its above my love life, which has been pretty quiet all the way till NTU.
Back in primary school, around primary 5, there was a girl named Yvonne who was said to be interested in me. I was a fat,ugly, short-tempered nerd back then,so i wondered what did she see in me. I din really take to her in the firstplace. Nonetheless, to an unpopular ugly guy, a girl interested in you is a rarity and flattering, and it is always tempting to give in, even though when one has no realinterest in the other party or not. I was tempted to get closer to her then.But as BGR is unheard of in our generation at that age, it progressed no further than the occasional childish teasing like "eeeee, she likes you lei!". She stayed at the flat facing mine on the opposite block, so we could clearly see each other when we go home. But i suppose it was just a passing puppylove/crush back then. Which I din hear of anymore since we left primary sch.What I would later get to know in sec sch is that she died in an asthma attack.Feels bad when u have a fren passing on so early in life.
Anyway, the 2nd girl on the list is Daphne, whom shan n i always refer to as"almost has been". Yes, Daph n I were an almost have been. I was in Sec 2then, she was a freshie. It was during the NPCC annual summer camp that wegot to know each other. She was in my group and I was the team leader then.I was one of the fitter guys, ok, I'm the FITTEST, in the sec 2 boys squad. So naturally I impressed many with my finesse in the games and my capability to lead the group. However, I was too focused on winning games for my team andguiding them to realise that she was interested in me. It was only i received the "best camper" award then one of the freshies told me that I had garnered quitea bit of attention. Somehow Daphne had gotten hold of my number and began to callme frequently after the camp. And we found out that we actually stayed in theopposite block, and there was a line of sight where we could see each other inour rooms. I din have any interest in her at all initially. It was until sch reopened and we got to know each others' frens then I got to know that she wasinterested in me. Then again, the unpopular guy theory I had stated above set in again.There are some other guys after her as well. Somehow there came a lot of people between us (guys after her, and girls after me; her claim, i dunno if its real or not), but we were unfazed. We were getting closerto each other all the time but somehow, at the end of Sec 2, things just did not work out and we just ended as almost have been. Guess I'm just in this just for the competition, not the girl. I quite a competitive person. So most probably I just got bored with thecompetition, and din really like her after all.
The 3rd girl is Wenxin, whom shan n i refer to as "zui mei de" (prettiest in chinese) She was in my batch in NPCC, and was EXTREMELY popular withthe guys. I started to have a crush on her since Sec 3 camp. She was pretty, fun and frenlyto speak of. I never had the courage to go after her, even though I took steps to get closerto her. It was pretty obvious to everyone that I had a crush on her. So much so that even "mum" (my form teacher) got to know about it. I had the impression that she was also kindainterested in me too, since she was quite frenly to me. Maybe I'm just overly sensitive then.Somehow we start some correspondence in Sec 4which continued all the way to JC2. She went to TJC and me, TPJC. I wanted to go to TJC allthese time, partly because of her too. But just too bad that my grades couldn't get me in.I had expected a girl like her to be able to get a BF quite quickly in JC, and not before longshe really got a BF. Not that I'm surprised but I was still pretty heartbroken that she's gone.Actually I had quite a few chances to date her before she got a BF, but I just din have theballs to do it and chickened out a few times. Cos I always felt inferior. I never really gotout of the mindset that I had back in primary school that I was undesirable, and read: unpopular guyThis is probably the reason why I would never get any girl then. I thoughtshe with such good qualities would look for a handsome, sporty and intelligent BF. But I knew I was wrong when I saw her BF. Not to backstab him but I'm just stating the facts. Her BF wasn'tgood-looking and had bad grades (we r just using a simplistic formula here, intelligent = good grades,dun flame me), but pretty sporty. Nonetheless, I was still hopeful that someday I can get togetherwith her. My crush on her lasted from Sec 3 to JC2. That's probably the reason why I din try to getany GF in JC. Not that I tot I could either. Throughout my army time, I would still occassionally think of her, for she was the only girl who had ever left such a huge impression on me back then. But it was also during my army time, then I finally realised that the the person I liked is the Wenxin in 1997, not the current person. And this managed to help me drop the idea of waiting for herand move on in life.
The first semester of my NTU life was pretty tranquil. Too focused on studies and I still looked fresh fromarmy with the nerdy black plastic specs from army and a crew cut head. It was only until yong qiang draggedme for a hair dye with him then things finally started to change and I started to attract some attention from theopposite sex. By the time exams were over, my copper red hair grew longer into a floppy style and has faded into a nice blonde color, and I made my first pair of contact lens so that I could play rugby in IHG.
The 4th girl in line is Jenny (3rd which I know to have had interest in me, put as 4th just for numbering sake)Got to know her through a canvassing job which she got for us for hall stuff at the PC fair as a sales promoter. As all my frens know, that I'm quiet with strangers, and only talk crap with close frens. Somehow the sales promoter job had forced a change in me in making me open up n be more talkative so that sales would come (n commission $ as well) When the job ended, I managed to get her number and took a photo with her with my arm on her shoulder. Thus She got to know me under that impression, that I was like one of those "buaya" from ACJC. But all that were do in the moment of fun. I din intend to call her or proceed any further than that. It was until we went back to hall, and there was once when she came over to chat with me in front of all those horny neighboursof mine. Everyone was shocked to see a "chio bu" approach me, and soon everyone was teasing me and egging me to go afterher. We progressed quickly, but soon I came to see the differences between us and realised that we aren't suitable foreach other. The person she liked is the junx during the PC Fair, the one who was outgoing, talkative and "buaya", and ofcourse, physical attraction plays a significant part too. I fitted into the 'ideal' BF description which I had set earlierin sec sch. Sporty (i was still damned fit from army), intelligent (simply speaking, good grades) and handsome (i lookedbetter then with the stylo hair n contact lens and bothered to dress up a bit). But such things cannot last for long,for i wasn't being myself during the PC Fair. I will revert back to my original bo chup mannerisms before long.She wasn't the type of girl that I liked either. I admit I was in it was largely due to peer pressure, physical attraction and the unpopular guy theory. Since i knew clearly we weren't made for each other, then I just started to drift away from her.
It was around this period when I got to know my dear better. First got to know dear when we were in the night cycling committee together but wasn't that close then cos I tot she was bryan's GF. It was also during this IHG period when bryanwas after another girl then I knew that she was single. I totthat she would make a nice GF, and was the type that I liked too. Fun, sporty, sporting and frenly! During this period, the guys would always go for late night suppers and she was always onz for supper, so I just called her to come along whenever possible, or buy back some supper for her. She liked to play video games too, and we would spend some time playingtogether as well. Some times we would eat lunch/dinner together and chat a bit online. But all this while we were just normal, close frens. When I hit the rocks with jenny, then I turned to her for some advice cos she was my only close female fren, so I tot she might give me some good counselling. (for the record, jen n me were never an item). Then somehow dear n i got closer and we started to take an interest in each other. Then its was during the CNY period when I needed some help to buy new clothings that we went to JP together as frens, and returned to hall as a couple. And we never looked back since then.
Hopefully dear will always be the final character in this story...
Mmmmmmmm, I'm fully awake now!
