On the road again

3 consecutive weeks of biz traveling, numbing the mind, no time to do my own stuff.
I want to spend more time with my little boy.

Seems like he is starting to understand that "papa" refers to me. At times he will call me "papa" with acknowledgment. It really melts me whenever he does that. Makes everything that is done for him worthwhile.

Short family holiday coming up this weekend.
First time that our whole family will be traveling together with everyone around.
I still remember the "it feels good to be family" feeling from the last Desaru trip where everyone (less bro and the 2 babies) were staying in the same apartment.
Hopefully this holiday will be enjoyable too.

It will be the First chop on Ryan's passport!
Many more to come!


Thoughts
Was watching this show on the flight to BKK earlier, only managed to watch half the show.
What really startled me, or got me thinking, was how I can actually empathize with Gurmit Singh's character, Professor Chua, in the show.
He is the typical good Singaporean daddy, taking the responsibility of supporting the family all by himself, only to find himself suddenly retrenched and unable to find gainful employment, turning to taxi driving as the last resort to bring home the dough. All these while very fearful of letting his family know that he has been laid off.
The heartbreaking moment was when he was being looked down by his son after his son unceremoniously found out about his new employment, and refused to talk to him for 5 days after the awakening.
Imagine a father trying so hard to make ends means, lowering himself to take up something which he himself despised, yet only to be despised by his own son.
As a daddy to a son now, I think I can understand his pain.

While I hope this will never happen to me, it still gives me a rude shock even though my job is relatively stable at the moment, I should not fall into the comfort zone, and shall always be prepared for any unwelcome changes that may happen.

Truth to be said, a sales job is not a glass rice bowl.
It may be pretty on the outside, but once dropped, it will just break into pieces.

I need to do a thoughts consolidation and really map out where I wanna be in 5 or 10 years time.
Going with the flow without a rudder is a bad idea. Especially now that I have to support a family, this will impact more than just me alone.
Better identify if there's gonna be rocks or waterfalls downstream.
居安思危

Loving my little boy more n more each day

Never really expected Baby Ryan to have made such a huge impact and difference in my life before he came to this world.

From someone whom has never liked babies/kids in his first 30 years of existence, to a loving father, the transition has been huge.

It is really amazing to see how Ryan has grown from a tiny newborn to a cute little toddler today, and how much he has learnt along the way. From learning how to roll over from his back, to his efforts at learning how to walk today, it has been a really enriching and fulfilling journey for both me and Lishan.

Whenever he says "mama" or "baba", it really melts our heart that our cute little boy is starting to be able to recognise his parents. (though he still calls mama all the time, even when I'm carrying him, until I make keep repeating that I'm baba, then he will let go of a few phrases every now n then)

It's not easy to go on business trips nowadays without missing him loads, but I still have to travel for my work so no choice.

Just have to make a note to myself, that no matter how busy I will be, I must always make the effort to spend more time with Ryan n Lishan.

Still harboring hopes of coming up with cutting edge technology

Reading technology blogs on news about the latest new technology and how it will help humanity in various different aspects has excited me in the past, and still continues to excite me today.

My mind will go into a whirl on how these tech can be deployed and tweaked to serve various different purposes and applications.

Remembering what Bro has said about start-ups in CA getting all kinds of funding to make their products come to realisation, I still hope that one day I'll be able to come up with some awesome ideas of my own and really get the chance to develop them.

A list of stuff that I had thought of more than 20 years ago:

• Vision Enabling - help the visually impaired to be able to see via conversion of optical visuals to neurological signals which can be deciphered by the brain, presenting real vision to the wearer
• Exoskeleton - help the semi-handicapped to be able to regain the ability to walk. Essentially a cyborg.
• Mind control - not controlling the mind of others, but rather something Jedi-like (even though I had never watched Star Wars before), that one will be able to control./manipulate objects, via brain activity. Pretty much like ESP, but I see that this can really be done. Given the wide proliferation of smartphones, and low costs of ASIC and FPGAs, this could become a reality soon.

Gotta do some proper house keeping, and keep a record of all my ideas and concepts.

Who knows one day, I will be able to turn them into reality.

(watching sci-fi stuff like Iron Man always reignites the geek in me)

As Adam savage says:

Been writing for the last 8+ years!

不经意的发现，右手边的栏目显示着我在8年前写的文字。
一切仿佛是昨天刚发生的事，蓦然回首8年匆匆飘过

世界变了。 我也变了。
昔日的大学生，今天的打工仔
昨日的小男生，已蜕变成现在的新手爸爸

当年我的世界环绕着念书，考试，成绩，对世界的憧憬和未来的渴望
如今经过社会的洗礼，现实生活的巨轮无情的往前转，生命的中心早已改变了，追求的东西与得失的计较以不同往年

或许是成熟了，也可以说是生活与习惯性规律的交叉， 参上了人夫与养育孩子的责任，对于很多事情的看法和当年大不相同。

哈哈。
为有一点我很确定没变的是，总在夜深人静时，胡思乱想，文笔依旧会心血来潮的乱写一番。

也许是昨天看见的1994年的偶像杂志吧。
搞得我突然那么多感触。

也好久没用华语来撰稿。
自从改用部落格写日记，就很久不再以华语表达内心的感受。
我想还是华语比较容易贴切的表达自己

Just noticed on the right hand side of the blog that I had been writing for the last 8+ years.
Went through a couple of old posts and it was like "damned, it feels just like yesterday but it's 8 years ago".

How I have changed, the topics and stuff that I will write about has changed.
From an Undergrad whining about school stuff, to race reports of my relentless pursuit in self torture.

Time really flies.